Blame it on Neptune

I've been reading about my generation lately. It seems like every economist, psychiatrist, mentor, parent and politician has us figured out. Or rather, they seem to understand why it is that we cannot be figured out. See, we are not lazy, but we can be loath to move until ready. We desire both success and wisdom, but are mystified as to how to get there. Most importantly, we are dependent, yet we do not know how to ask for help. Our generation seems excessively idealistic, but without a plan.  

Apparently, its a Neptune thing. I recently heard that the astrological placement of this slow-moving planet has somehow shaped our dreams, ideals, and intuition, and may explain our similar confusions and disillusionments.

Whether or not this is true I do not know, but it did get me thinking. 

Our generation really does over idealize everything. We have deep feelings and beliefs about our life's purpose and we all know we want to reach the top. We all know we want to be happy. What we don't know, however, is how to get there, and who we want to be when we arrive. We fantasize in pictures about achieving our goals and living the worry-free life of an accomplished person with all the time in the world to help others. Yet these dreams do not include clear pictures of ourselves. What has this ideal version of ourselves learned? What paralyzing struggles built us up to this point of success and fulfillment? If fantasies come from the ego, are we likely imagining ourselves humble? Wise? Peaceful? I doubt it. 

The Facebook-era has caused us to become little more than a picture of ourselves. We fool ourselves into thinking we are who we choose to portray at any given moment. Yet, on the other end of this, we truly do have ideas and inspirations and a desire to share. 

I think what gets us all so down, though, is the extreme lack of clarity on what to do next. Work a little harder on tomorrow's to-do list? Make 15 more phone calls? Save money? I get the feeling that isn't it. 

I wonder if this universe, which we are all apparently trying to conquer, is trying to show us how it operates so that we might actually have a shot. Ever the idealists, we think we can build our vehicle and rise to the top alone. If it takes longer than we want, we work harder and harder until the eventual disillusionment sets in. Disillusionment, that horrible, relationship-ending, impulsive, self-defeating low. It makes you just want to move far away so you can shake things up (and re-build your little fantasy). 

Little. That is what my dreams of success and accomplishment are. They are nothing more than a Facebook album or an episode of Entourage. The times I ask for help and appreciate the wisdom of others are the times I get closer to seeing how big the world really is. Oddly, it has only been in this humility that I have ever tasted any success. We have to let go of the things we think we desperately want and embrace that which we are terribly afraid of. Embrace the confusion and instability as an opportunity to test our spiritual certainty that if we let go, ask for help, and worry about the well-being of others, this universe may just worry about the well being of ourselves. 

For now, we will continue the symptoms of our generation's quarter-life confusion, but I think we should do so with a little bit of the idealism we are known for. However, this time, instead of imagining ourselves as the ones who will come up with all of the answers, let's have a little faith that the world itself has the answers and, by law, we will find them if we open up, ask the right questions, and change our nature every day. That path will light up for us soon, I'm sure of it.